Just Breathe

Today is a bad day. My entire upper torso feels like it is made from shards of glass and barbed wire. I am painfully aware of every single breathe I take. I feel sharp pain in my ribs, my diaphragm, my shoulders, my spine, and my neck every inhale and exhale. In addition to that, I get stinging, electrical pain at every stitch, as if made from hot wire.

Ok, so don't breathe, right? I wish. Even holding my breathe, there is still residual pain from all the breathing before. And then, I need to take a deeper breathe, and that's just terrible. Don't even get me started on talking. That's even worse. Or, the fact that my baby likes to be sung to sleep. But the argument that missing nap time will result in more talking later, gives me the fuel to sing his songs quietly.

Things I never thought could cause such pain: singing, talking, laughing, breathing.

Today, CRPS is trying to steal my joy. But I won't allow it. I won't stand for it. Literally, I'm just laying in bed.

It's a rough day, but I imagine it could be worse. It could be like my days with bacterial meningitis or spinal epidural abcess. Those days were definitely worse. So, at least there's that.

And, I will pray. And calmy, quietly breathe.

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